My love/hate relationship with ADHD

I know I haven't posted in a while, but I am about to embark on a life changing journey. And it will start Monday. During winter break I woke up one morning, looked at my mom, and said, "Let's apply for some internships." I began surfing the list of 70+ internships my school had connections with. It took forever because 1) they didn't have a category with my specific major and 2) the internship options were kind of mixed majors anyway (mostly insurance companies, etc, nothing I was interested in). I finally found a few and applied. One that stood out was the Smithsonian Institute. It was a little intimidating but I thought, why not apply. So I did. Fast forward a few months of communicating with the Smithsonian and I got the internship. The crazy part is my email was not loading correctly on my phone recently, so when I refreshed my email at 2:30 in the morning, I noticed an email titled the Smithsonian but from a different sender. I opened it, preparing myself...

I know I haven't posted in a while but recently I had an incident that just took me overboard... Saturday. I had my day all planned out. I woke up early enough to go to the café and eat a balanced, healthy breakfast: omelet with meat & veggies and a bowl of honeydew melon. Then, before work at 12:45, I was going to go to the gym for roughly 45 minutes; get some running in (my effort in trying to be in the gym more). I packed my gym bag, gathered my homework materials to do at work, and headed for the gym. 1.  When I got to the gym, there was a sign on the door, "CLOSED FOR CLEANING 12pm-2pm". Needless to say I was heated. I had my whole morning planned out; this was how my day was going to begin, on a good note. I was lost. I didn't know what I was going to do until work. I went and watched the baseball game but I had to vent. I called my mom and went off. I began disowning my university. I hated how unprofessional they were being. They could have cleaned befor...

Monday: It's the last day of my boredom. Students will start to move in tomorrow, however, they've moved the start date for classes to Thursday, so I'll have a day with friends to play in the snow (currently planning a trip to the slopes for Wednesday!). My roommate will be moving in extra early so I'll have a friend here around 9am. I'd say I'm proud of myself for getting through this but I didn't exactly get through it because I had a minor breakdown last night. These thoughts racing through my head were depressing as I don't know what. But I woke up today trying to be in a better mood. I'm going to straighten my hair later, and then hopefully the TV in the lounge is working so I'll catch my Monday night shows later. What I did today: -did a little yoga to try and calm myself -had breakfast -watched another movie -took another half Nyquil and went to sleep (I woke up entirely too early today) -talked to my boyfriend Honestly, this whol...

Sunday: I've hit a depressive state. I've run out of things to do. I can't think of anymore movies to watch, I've seen it all. I'm alone with my thoughts and its becoming destructive. I need to find something to do. I have this magic power of putting myself in a depressive state. Cool, huh? If I am not constantly moving, then my brain is. And now I've just created an argument with my boyfriend for no reason. Which feeling sorry about that and thinking "why did you go and do that?" is not helping my situation. It's like I impulsively instigated a fight because I am so bored, and even if there is some truth to what I said, it was out of impulsivity. And now I need to fix it. I'm so bored. Feeling sorry for myself-- This ADHD is just not something I enjoy dealing with most days... What I've done today: -watched 3 movies this morning -decided I'm going to dig out my car -(one hour and 2 ft of snow later) went to food lion -meal plan k...

Saturday: I'M DYING!! I didn't get to sleep until about 2:30am last night. I woke up around 6:45 this morning. I laid there thinking "what the hell am I going to do at this hour?" I looked outside to see how much snow we got (they were predicting about two feet for Frostburg) and what do ya know, just about two feet was right outside my window. The snow plows were working diligently overnight, (partially why I barely got any sleep) and all their hard work, all their tracks.. covered. What I accomplished today: -went to try and start my car -stood in the snow and measured it (just above my knees) -looked at my car from afar -realized it's buried and that I will not be starting it up today. Try again tomorrow, Allyson. -came back inside -took a shower -took half a Nyquil to knock me out for the day -turned on Straight Outta Compton (took me all day to watch it since the Nyquil knocked me out) -finished Straight Outta Compton -stared out the window for 1...

Friday: This is day one of loneliness. I'm bored out of my mind. Needless to say my ADHD is kicking in, and will be kicking in until my friends get here and school starts. To round off the day, here is a list of things I've accomplished: -watched the Penguins of Madagascar -watched Joy -watched some episodes of of shows on Comedy Central -created a professional profile for internships/future jobs -applied to another internship -ran to the store to pick a couple more food items -got to know my new RA a little bit -read a little of my current read: The Art of Intrusion (a cyber security book) -fell asleep watching reruns of Friends

So, it's been a longgggg time since I've posted anything. As some of you may know, the EAST got a huge snow storm so while trapped at school, I figured I'd let you all know how I'm doing and what I've been up to! Over winter break, I've been working. I had to make some more money so I'd have some money to spend when I got back to school; especially when I want to go snowboarding. I made sure to see some friends while I was home; I think I covered everybody. Unfortunately I had to move back into school a little early; not too early, just by a few days. My job at school got some new software so they scheduled some job training before school started. The real reason I chose to write a blog entry, is for this situation I am currently experiencing. Monday: I call the residence life office to make sure I am still set to move in early on Friday. I call, they ask my name, student ID, and finally found me on the list. However, due to the huge snow storm we were a...