Stress Relief
I know I haven't posted in a while but recently I had an incident that just took me overboard...
Saturday.
I had my day all planned out. I woke up early enough to go to the café and eat a balanced, healthy breakfast: omelet with meat & veggies and a bowl of honeydew melon. Then, before work at 12:45, I was going to go to the gym for roughly 45 minutes; get some running in (my effort in trying to be in the gym more). I packed my gym bag, gathered my homework materials to do at work, and headed for the gym. 1. When I got to the gym, there was a sign on the door, "CLOSED FOR CLEANING 12pm-2pm". Needless to say I was heated. I had my whole morning planned out; this was how my day was going to begin, on a good note. I was lost. I didn't know what I was going to do until work. I went and watched the baseball game but I had to vent. I called my mom and went off. I began disowning my university. I hated how unprofessional they were being. They could have cleaned before the opening time (12pm) instead of cleaning when they were supposed to open. Long story short, I was mad for majority of my work shift, which ends at 5pm. (I know. Unnecessary. overdramatic. I get it). So once I got off of work, I ended up going to the gym, and with a friend, for about an hour. Then I went back to my room to shower and get ready for my plans I had that night. My boyfriend was taking me out to dinner for my birthday (still cannot believe I'm 22 years old). As I thought I was completely over the whole gym issue that morning, I tried to be positive for my special dinner. 2. I tried on this new shirt I had and while it fit fine, I was feeling a little unflattering in it. I fixed it up and then proceeded to the car.
3. As I was waiting for my boyfriend, I noticed one of my sleeves just felt too tight; I thought I had rolled it up to tightly. So I'm franticly trying to loosen it, and it's just not working. So I did my best and just left it alone. He gets to the car and we start to leave. I ask, "Where are we going? Do you know how to get there?" He said no and asked me to Google the directions. Well, we're heading off campus so I was losing wifi, which meant I couldn't Google the location to get us there; plus the service is very poor in the mountains. 4. So not having a connection was frustrating me to no end. Half way there he dials the number and asks me to tell them we are going to be late, to which I then franticly ask, "YOU HAVE A RESERVATION?!?" He replies yes, at 7:45... which was what the clock was reading. 5. So now, we're late; I hate being late.
We get to the restaurant and sit down. Throughout the whole meal, I just cannot seem to show a smile. While I was enjoying the gracious gesture of him doing all this for me, I could not for the life of me show it. 6. And I felt really bad. After dinner he runs me to the mall really quick, to my favorite store, and tells me to pick out an outfit, to which my eyes lit right up! But I still couldn't seem to smile.
I end up wanting to come back another time and we went to the car to go home. Meanwhile, he's been asking me all night what's wrong, what's wrong, to which I continuously reply "nothing." At last, the water works begin to flow. But this was not just any crying. I was hysterical. It could not be controlled. I was crying as if I had lost someone so near and dear to my heart so suddenly. He had no idea what was going on. The worst part? Neither did I. I couldn't even pronounce words properly. I called my mom (because moms can fix ANYTHING!). She couldn't even understand me. But she knew. She asked for my boyfriend and she just told him, "There's nothing you can do. You cannot fix what is going on. All she needs from you right now is to hold her. Hold her and let her know everything is going to be okay."
I numbered the events to illustrate how these events occurred and kept building up in my brain as my day went on. Turns out, I was extremely stressed out. Just from everything; life, relationships, school, adult duties, and possibly even the thought that I had just turned 22, feeling like life is going to fast and I can't keep up. I was crying for an hour. Crying hard. I couldn't breathe. But he held me. And I soon got over it.
Turns out, I stress a lot. I knew I could get stressed but there must be times when I get so stressed that I don't even realize it. It builds up, and I just lose it. I guess there will be more of these days, but for now, I'll just take it one day at a time.
Saturday.
I had my day all planned out. I woke up early enough to go to the café and eat a balanced, healthy breakfast: omelet with meat & veggies and a bowl of honeydew melon. Then, before work at 12:45, I was going to go to the gym for roughly 45 minutes; get some running in (my effort in trying to be in the gym more). I packed my gym bag, gathered my homework materials to do at work, and headed for the gym. 1. When I got to the gym, there was a sign on the door, "CLOSED FOR CLEANING 12pm-2pm". Needless to say I was heated. I had my whole morning planned out; this was how my day was going to begin, on a good note. I was lost. I didn't know what I was going to do until work. I went and watched the baseball game but I had to vent. I called my mom and went off. I began disowning my university. I hated how unprofessional they were being. They could have cleaned before the opening time (12pm) instead of cleaning when they were supposed to open. Long story short, I was mad for majority of my work shift, which ends at 5pm. (I know. Unnecessary. overdramatic. I get it). So once I got off of work, I ended up going to the gym, and with a friend, for about an hour. Then I went back to my room to shower and get ready for my plans I had that night. My boyfriend was taking me out to dinner for my birthday (still cannot believe I'm 22 years old). As I thought I was completely over the whole gym issue that morning, I tried to be positive for my special dinner. 2. I tried on this new shirt I had and while it fit fine, I was feeling a little unflattering in it. I fixed it up and then proceeded to the car.
3. As I was waiting for my boyfriend, I noticed one of my sleeves just felt too tight; I thought I had rolled it up to tightly. So I'm franticly trying to loosen it, and it's just not working. So I did my best and just left it alone. He gets to the car and we start to leave. I ask, "Where are we going? Do you know how to get there?" He said no and asked me to Google the directions. Well, we're heading off campus so I was losing wifi, which meant I couldn't Google the location to get us there; plus the service is very poor in the mountains. 4. So not having a connection was frustrating me to no end. Half way there he dials the number and asks me to tell them we are going to be late, to which I then franticly ask, "YOU HAVE A RESERVATION?!?" He replies yes, at 7:45... which was what the clock was reading. 5. So now, we're late; I hate being late.
We get to the restaurant and sit down. Throughout the whole meal, I just cannot seem to show a smile. While I was enjoying the gracious gesture of him doing all this for me, I could not for the life of me show it. 6. And I felt really bad. After dinner he runs me to the mall really quick, to my favorite store, and tells me to pick out an outfit, to which my eyes lit right up! But I still couldn't seem to smile.
I end up wanting to come back another time and we went to the car to go home. Meanwhile, he's been asking me all night what's wrong, what's wrong, to which I continuously reply "nothing." At last, the water works begin to flow. But this was not just any crying. I was hysterical. It could not be controlled. I was crying as if I had lost someone so near and dear to my heart so suddenly. He had no idea what was going on. The worst part? Neither did I. I couldn't even pronounce words properly. I called my mom (because moms can fix ANYTHING!). She couldn't even understand me. But she knew. She asked for my boyfriend and she just told him, "There's nothing you can do. You cannot fix what is going on. All she needs from you right now is to hold her. Hold her and let her know everything is going to be okay."
I numbered the events to illustrate how these events occurred and kept building up in my brain as my day went on. Turns out, I was extremely stressed out. Just from everything; life, relationships, school, adult duties, and possibly even the thought that I had just turned 22, feeling like life is going to fast and I can't keep up. I was crying for an hour. Crying hard. I couldn't breathe. But he held me. And I soon got over it.
Turns out, I stress a lot. I knew I could get stressed but there must be times when I get so stressed that I don't even realize it. It builds up, and I just lose it. I guess there will be more of these days, but for now, I'll just take it one day at a time.
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